Let go of the anchors

Let go of the anchors.  It is a profound statement but necessary in the healing process.

I have been in an emotional relationship with a man that I dated for a few months several years ago. He has contacted me off and on for the past three and half years and we talk mostly about what might have been. I should explain that we  have an unusual bond that puzzles me to this day.

At this moment in my life, I have been in a relationship with another man who I care for deeply. The only problem with our relationship is distance and my schedule.  Many have said that he or I should just move.  It is not as easy, unfortunately. So we will continue to drive back and forth when our schedules allow.

I digress back to what made me write this post. A few days ago I was contacted by emo again. He asked about my new position.  After texting back and forth, he asked if I would ever move out near my job.  I actually had been contemplating such a move for a few weeks. I asked why and he said we could move in together. Now I know what you are thinking. Why am I having a conversation with a man that I am not romantically involved with now? Honestly, our bond has always intrigued me and the anchor kept me in the what if stage.

I was taken aback by his statement. When we originally dated I thought he was going to be in my life as a mate.  That however never happened and I moved on or so I thought.  Actually, I moved him to a compartment in my mind.  In that space, I often thought of what if.  He lives closer was always the thought that justified everything. That emotional anchor that had been tying him to me was also pulling me down. Mr. Emo was dragging me into his emotional hell and I was letting him. While on the other side Mr. Distance (who will be reading this I am sure) was/has been my emotional support since we met.

Why was I allowing this to happen?  It had to be more than the bond. Today it dawned on me.  At the point in my life when I met Mr. Emo, I thought I needed a man to complete me. Today, I know I am complete by myself. I am a strong and capable individual. I have survived many downs but celebrated many more victories. Today I celebrate another victory. I actually cut the anchor and told Mr. Emo to have a wonderful life and not to contact me further. The weight of Emo's problems is no longer my issue. Such a liberating feeling and all it took was me cutting that bond.